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I have the chance to see and talk to many women, and have found it very interesting. I watch the women
I have relationships with, be it professional, or personal. Listening to the lives, I have had the opprotunity
to have a first hand look at. One the things I have noticed that men, not their children make the most impact on their
lives, not realizing that those same men that they are putting first is the same man that is upsetting the family. There
are many other factors that make a difference in the family situation as well.
1. Unstable financial situations
2. Lack of Education
3. Lack of Ambition
Many women see their lives as something they have no control to change, that they are stuck in the rut they
have found themselves in. It is easy to settle, most of the women I know have settled for many different reasons, some
of them are personal and some of them are very universal. For example, when we sit down and talk with the "girls", what
are the subjects that come up the most? Our men, and our children, most of the time in that order. 9 times out
of 10, we all have the same problems, coming out in different forms, but the same none the less. I feel as women
we need to decide what we are going to accept or not, it all comes down to the question, just how much we can take and still
be ok with ourselves. We can always see someone elses life clear as a bell, but when it comes to our own it gets foggier.
In those conversations with our "girls" we are very quick to hand out the wouldas, couldas, shouldas. There have been
many times I have handed out the baskets full of shouldas, you need tos, and I wouldas only to realize the card actually
had my name on it.
There are moments that really seem to catch our attention, even for just a second. No real thought
to it when it is time for you to leave someone, it just happens. You can either accept it and leave, or you can continue
to settle and stay. I feel in any relationship, there has to be constant restocking, renegotionating, overhauling if
necessary, and finally letting go if things go that way. Letting go is one of the hardest things to do, the letting
go is the painful part. It reminds me of taking off a bandaid, seems like no matter how you pull it off, it still hurts
like hell. Then come the realiztion that what the wound needed was air, to experience life. When you come to that
realization about any aspect of your life, you can feel it in your bones. Your heart races, you look to other things
to find the happness you once had, a restlessness that buzzes at the edges, waiting for you acknowlege it. All of the
sudden you are Dorothy landing in Oz, technocolor at its finest, as Oprah calls it your "Ah hah moment". This is the
time to have words with yourself. This is the time to tell you all about yourself, be it encouragement, cursing, laughing,
crying, whatever comes to the surface at this moment is the realest you will ever feel and you have grown another inch.
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